Pre day 1

 

Today is Day one

 

So we are now in day two psych we’re still in day one it is pre-official day when one is over which means that it’s going to be a while before you can see me say hey day one is over and the reason why is because I don’t wanna make mistakes that I’ve done in the past where I’ve said hey I’m done with day one and it’s a problem I explained it in the videos of you saw the video and you heard me you will know that that is what I said but also I wanted to be clear because this is a journey that I am taking like within a dream within a dream with a new journey and what I mean by that is I’m learning a bunch of new things I’m getting rid of a bunch of old things and it takes a lot of work to learn a bunch of things at once look I don’t wanna play any games with anyone because I know that I’ve done it 1 million times and in order for me to really be the person that I would like to be I have to be steadfast and honest and truthful and that takes a lot of work for someone who has an eating disorder and has not been honest and true with themselves about how bad the addiction is a lot of people don’t understand how bad an eating addiction can be but I must say it can be as bad as doing drugs even worse so because you have to eat every day yes you can go on a liquid diet but I can only last for so long at some point you’re going to have to eat real food whether you go on a liquid fast for a year or for six months over six days at some point you’re going to have to turn in that food for some other sort of food you’re going to have to go from soup to salad yummy yummy to some type of salad food and my goal is to get there one step at a time no need to rush because there’s so many things that I have to learn and so many things I have to fix along the way that will take more than just this part of my journey to fix and I need to learnWhat things will take this amount of time and what things will take way longer but I don’t know how long it’ll take to fix and I think that’s a big thing for everyone when they have an addiction is just starting from the bottom it’s being reborn againAnyway I’m about to go to sleep and hopefully you catch me tomorrow saying that I am officially in day two instead of saying we’re starting all over again because that would be a bummer well into next time smooches write to you later peace